How to help an over-active baby sleep better
by Heidi Holvoet

Baby playing at water

Bouncy, always on, never sits still: good and fun qualities!

But when out of balance, this can lead to poor sleep so let's look at the proven strategies to help your over-active baby sleep a deep, restful and healthy sleep.

Settling down to a restful healthy sleep is difficult for a baby/toddler who's always 'on', always wants to explore, loves moving all the time and wants/needs to be active all the time.

How does being active hamper baby's sleep?

Getting that energy out, and being active enough to get nicely tired: perfect!

But when it's out of balance, sleep suffers.

And contrary to common belief this trouble with sleep is rarely 'because they don't want to miss out', or just want to 'keep moving'.

It's primarily due to a baby's body and brain being so ramped up, their nervous system on high - and this is a self-increasing process (more activeness leads to more activeness, and need for activeness) -

that it can become almost impossible to reach a calm enough state to be able to settle down to sleep.

Let's have a look at how to know "Is my baby over-active, and why?", and then the strategies to help your over-active baby or toddler sleep.

Photo of baby playing by the water by Denis Almeida on Pexels

"Is my baby over-active, and why?"

When does "active" become "over-active"?

Being active all or most of the time is very common with babies and toddlers these days. And to be very clear: there is nothing wrong with being active a lot!

On the contrary, being active a lot of the time is crucial for your baby's development.

But for healthy development and for a reasonable chance at sleeping well, we need balance.

A baby or toddler who spends most of their awake time in an active state, and barely in calm and settled states, can become over-active, and very difficult to settle and sleep well.

Sweet baby smiling

How does a baby become over-active?

We see being over-active in babies and toddlers of all ages, and for a variety of reasons.

The most common reasons that a baby/toddler reaches over-activeness most of their awake time are:

  • Personality, natural preference, enjoys having boisterous fun
  • Easily bored
  • Calm activities such as storytime/puzzles are too challenging, or not challenging enough
  • Over- or under-responsiveness to sensory triggers
  • Revved up by continuously/often stimulating environment - things and people
  • Out of balance amount of indoor vs outdoor time

This list is not exhaustive. The simple rule of thumb is: when something seems out of balance for your baby or toddler.

Because once more as it's important: there is nOthing wrong with being active. It's only when things get out of balance, i.e. the activeness is not kept in check by sufficient calmness, that it can affect your baby's sleep negatively.

❗️ Important remark: there is NO benchmark for this. There's no other baby you can compare to when it comes to "how much is too much?". What a good calming balance looks like is completely individual.

So let's see how you can find that balance for Your baby / toddler.

2 steps to help your over-active baby or toddler sleep

The direct reason over-activeness can hamper sleep is increased wakefulness at sleep moments (and not the over- versus under-tiredness principle).

When not balanced by calm and a regulated nervous system, the activeness keeps the body and mind 'on', also when it's time to relax and settle to sleep.

To help an over-active baby sleep better, it starts with balance and regulation:

  1. Offer balance
    • ⚖️ balance active with calm moments
    • ⚖️ balance physically active with mentally stimulating activities
    • ⚖️ balance all sensory triggers to Your baby/toddler's optimal levels
  2. Regulate the nervous system*

* The Break the Cycle tasks (part of the Overcome Frequent Waking program) help you effectively soften and regulate your little one's nervous system.

Using the known principles of co-regulation and nervous system-regulating techniques, the easy-to-do tasks help your baby/toddler be more settled, find calm.

Without 'pinning' them down or trying to dampen the lovely boisterousness!

Just really gentle, really effectively, find that active-calm balance.

Even if you feel they're "not made" to sit still, know that every child can, and if they're to sleep well and be emotionally regulated, must, learn to spend time in calmness, however briefly.

And when that happens, even for brief moments at first, it's so beautiful to witness: when a baby comes to experience true calm, feel much more settled, and content. 💛

Remember, it's balance and regulation for Your unique baby.

There's not a one-fits-all amount of active vs calm.

To find out what Your little one's balance points are: start from where you are now, and gradually add a little more calm/mentally stimulating or more/less/different sensory triggers.

One small step at at ime, and you will discover the sweet spot for your baby or toddler. ⚖️

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