Interview with No Cry Sleep Solution Author Elizabeth Pantley
Elizabeth Pantley introduces her approach to sleep and the No Cry Sleep Solution in this enticing interview with Baby-Sleep-Advice.comElizabeth's warm and caring approach in the No Cry Sleep Solution offers sleep guidance to parents all around the world. This sleep method is child-centered and aims to help a baby sleep without the need for crying.
In this interview, Elizabeth gives a few personal insights in her no cry approach to babies and sleep. If you want to learn more, be sure to also discover Elizabeth's other books: The No-Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers and Preschoolers
,
The
No-Cry Nap Solution
, The
No-Cry Potty Training Solution
and the
recent The
No-Cry Separation Anxiety Solution
. Here comes the interview!
Elizabeth, your No Cry Sleep Solution book was your first, and still
the best known book in your No Cry series. Can you summarise the essence of the No Cry Sleep Solution and the main reasons for the success so many parents report?
As a mom of four I struggled with my own children’s sleep issues. I’m a sensitive Mom, and I can’t bear to let my children cry – but I’m also a busy mom who needs her sleep! It was from my own needs that The No-Cry Sleep Solution was born. I gathered a group of Test Moms with non-sleeping babies and gradually discovered a whole series of solutions that don’t including making a baby (or a Mommy) cry.
Say a parent to a healthy 6 month old baby who has troubles self soothing and sleeping for longer stretches wants to start with the No Cry Sleep Solution. What will be the steps she will go through?
The first thing to understand is that every baby is unique and sleep problems are different for every family. A one-size-fits-all solution usually doesn’t fit all babies! So the first step is to do a one-day sleep log and take a good look at the results to determine your babies exact problems, whether it’s taking a long time to fall asleep or waking up every hour to breastfeed. Once a parent identifies their baby’s issues they can then review all the different solutions and put together a custom plan of solutions.
One of the much appreciated aspects of the No Cry Sleep Solution to
me, is that you address all ‘types’ of parents. Even though the approach is very close to attachment parenting, also parents who are not AP-minded at all, can connect and find their no-cry path. How do you manage to reconcile very different approaches?
Regardless of parenting philosophy all parents have things in common – they love their babies, they don’t like to hear them cry, and they want their baby to get adequate sleep. Babies are also alike in so many ways – for example, they all need a typical amount of naps and night sleep. Once we realize this we can see that our end goals are very much alike.
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Many of today’s parents were raised with the belief that some, and sometimes a lot, crying is simply unavoidable. Their own parents often try to convince them that any no-cry solution will spoil the child and may even encourage waking up at night. How do you help uncertain young parents overcome such doubts?
A baby’s only way to communicate their distress, pain or difficulty is through their tears. When a baby cries and we respond we tell them that the world is a good place and their needs will be heard. If a baby is left to cry for long periods without any response he may give up and fall asleep – but it is just that – giving up. I believe it’s better to respond to babies and help them learn to fall asleep on their own without the distress of allowing them to cry.
Are there any examples or situations where you would agree with those
paediatricians and sleep experts who say that (some) crying is necessary to teach babies how to sleep well?
Nope!
From my experience all babies can learn to sleep better without having to suffer the pain of crying to sleep.
Your newest book, the No Cry Separation Anxiety Solution touches
another extremely important aspect of a young child’s life: the fear of not seeing a loved one again. We see it in young babies too and it is often a hidden sleep disturbance. A baby who had been sleeping through the night consistently, suddenly wakes up frequently again, or has problems settling at night. What are your best tips for good sleep in spite of baby separation anxiety?
If a child has always been a good sleeper, but suddenly the bedtime routine is filled with battles, and she gets scared when you leave the room and cries for you during the night, then she could have separation anxiety issues.
For a number of children, typically between the first and third birthday, fear of being alone becomes a cause for these new bedtime problems. If you think about it, the longest separation between you and your child is during nighttime sleep when the two of you are apart for ten to twelve hours. During this time your child will have a number of normal brief awakenings from sleep, when she’ll open her eyes and realize that she’s all alone. This same thing happens every night, so when your child knows that this long separation is about to occur it may create struggles at bedtime.
A quiet, loving bedtime routine can be very helpful. A stuffed animal sleeping buddy can also be comforting to a child. Keeping your own positive attitude will convey a good message to your child.
Thank you Elizabeth for this interview!
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