your baby sleep better. Teach her to
and simmer down
yourself with simple relaxation
Creating a positive attitude towards sleep for
your baby and yourself is a great idea. It is
the best start
for a lifetime of good sleep
And right now, it will help with
the night, settle well at nap times, go to bed with
... not only now, but also as a toddler, growing up child and later as
Being positive about bedtime is all about teaching
your child that sleeping is a good thing. Not only good because it is
and necessary, but because
can be a very pleasant
And of course your child's positive attitude starts with
yours. Even better, if you manage to relax in your baby's sleep
will find that it works wonders: not only do you feel better yourself,
you transmit that to your little one ...
... and she'll have much more restful naps and nights.
The 2 most important tips for a positive attitude
Sleeping is fun!
One crucial lesson for your little one is that
is a good thing
. Tiny as she is, even a newborn will feel
your positive, or negative, feelings toward sleep.
Think of a baby, hearing either one of the next
two sentences, several times every day:
"O no, time for bed! I'm so sorry but
you need to go to sleep now. Poor thing ..."
- or -
"Time for bed little one. Time to
cuddle up nice and warm and have a nice nap, enjoy ..."
A bit of a difference, right? And the impact is huge.
It's so simple, but using the second sentence
is a superb way to build that all-needed positive attitude. One that
your little one will keep for the rest of her life.
Let go ...
This is really good advice. But it can also sound like the worst!
How do you let go or relax on command?! I know. It can help to realize though that it's OK for a baby not to
sleep through the night, yet. It's OK as a new mom or dad to be tired.
It's not a race as in
whose baby is the first to sleep through the
Of course you really want a good restful night
yourself too. But if that doesn't happen yet, really, it's normal, and it's OK.
Of course you're concerned and you worry. But try to let go, in the sense that knowing that it's normal, and it will get better, you don't have to be super worried.
yourself to relax about it even just a little bit. You will feel better.
One related tip
from my own experience
that clock! (or phone!)
At first I spent many nights calculating how
much (ehm, little) I had
slept. At each feed I was checking my alarm clock and did my math.
How little hours had I had, how little still to
But the numbers made me worry more about the exhaustion and sleep deprivation I was piling up rather than be helpful in any way!
Then one night, I just hid the clock. I did not
calculate anymore, and just let things happen. And you know what happened, I suddenly slept more
and better. Just because I wasn't worrying in that way anymore, I was calmer. My little baby girl seemed to feel this. Even if she didn't magically start sleeping
through for 12 hours, there was a clear improvement.
So, strange as it may seem, the less you worry about "she h
to sleep through the night", the easier it becomes to get there.
Try to incorporate the simple positive attitude changes in your
daily routines. You will feel the benefits!
Heidi Holvoet, PhD, is the founder of the Baby Sleep Advice website and movement, an award-winning author, baby & toddler sleep consultant with 15+ years experience as well as a certified lactation counselor.
Over the years, Heidi has received several awards inluding a Mom's Choice Award (MCA) and National Parenting Awards (NAPPA) for her Baby Sleep Advice website, programs and books. Also, Baby Sleep Advice was awarded "Most Trusted Infant's Sleep Solutions Company 2023" in the Benelux Enterprise Awards 2023.
Heidi continually conducts personal research and participates in continued education and in that way stays up to date with current scientific and pyschosocial infant care.
She is also a member of the Association of Professional Sleep Consultants of which she was one of the earliest contributors. She obtained her PhD degree in physics at the University of Ghent in Belgium.
Heidi is passionate about helping babies and their parents sleep more and better, with her trademark approach that has been proven and praised time and again by parents worldwide to be effective and truly no-tears. Respect for you as a parent and your baby, is at the heart of Heidi's warm and kind support. Her approach always keeps in mind a baby's needs and abilities at any given age, is based on pediatric science and the most up to date knowledge in infant care and sleep science.